Adoption vs Library

Mark and I have a wonderful library in our upper living room filled with books from all genres. We love all our books enough to move them from Alberta to British Columbia. Boxes of books are heavy, and we had many. Half of our belongings are books. Our library is bigger than our combined wardrobe.

With that being said, we needed to figure out what we were going to do with all these books now that we have decided to adopt our future child. We also needed a space for our child to play…that space was best upstairs. Mark and I decided that the bedrooms should be kept for relaxing. Our child’s, possibly children, library, clothes, and the bed would be the main focus of their room. So, where would they play?

The best place to put the playspace would be in the main living room. This way they could play while Mark or I made dinner, did dishes or tidied up. The only problem was our beloved books dominated the space. With adoption, children that come into the home might act out in a way were things get destroyed. This was brought to our attention during our adoption education program. We took what we learned and place that logic into the upstairs of our home. Although we are still waiting for the home study to be started we have already begun reorganizing our home. The library was the top of the list of our concerns. We didn’t want the books to be mutilated and we also didn’t want to tell the child not to touch them. Over and over. We want our upstairs to be a place they could roam freely without always hearing no.

Mark and I ended up dismantling the bookshelves and putting them downstairs in the TV room. It’s only a band-aid until our child becomes more comfortable with us and with the home. When they are older we’ll be able to put the bookshelves back in our library. Until then we are still thinking of ways to make our home as comfortable as possible for our future child.

We have a YouTube channel devoted to our adoption journey.
Here is the link: Our Journey to Family 
The link to the post about the library: The Library. Adoption Home Study.
Second Library post liknk: Adoption Waiting. Waiting. Waiting.

I can’t wait until I can share my love of stories with my child. The library I’ve created for them is filled with many types of books that are funny and fun. I plan to make storytime into a bonding moment for us as a family. Trips to the library and bookstores, ah, I can’t wait.

Advertisements

Adoption in Writing. And then, Adopting…

I started writing Wicked Soul Ascension long before I started thinking about children. I knew Mark and I would want children in the future, but we never talked about it. My main character from Wicked Soul Ascesnsion, Blaze, was adopted by her family after she lost her mother and father in a fire. I never thought that years later my husband and I would enter the adoption process after my novel was published.

The problem with having written an adopted character:
I didn’t know much about the process or the traumas of an adoptee. I heard many stories about international adoptions and domestic adoptions. I also have experience working with children that have been adopted. But now, I’m going to be the mother of an adopted child.
How will they feel when they read this fictional story?
Will I ever write about an adoptee again?
These questions have been weighing heavily on my heart.

On the other hand…
Maybe my child will want to become a writer. I can’t wait to read to him/her books while we curl up in their bed. Trips to the library.

This adventure is the scariest one yet.

 

Wicked Soul Ascension 
Want a read that will get your heart pumping?
Available in print and eBook.

Youtube Vlog about our adoption:
Latest Video
Our Journey to Family

 

Adoption on the Brain. YouTube: Fumble

I made a Youtube video yesterday and realised that I wasn’t in the right head space to make one. Lately, I haven’t been able to talk with all these things going on.
(Link to the video: Adoption Education Program.)

Writing a book, working full time, getting debt free, getting fit, adopting from foster care, and vlogging about the adoption. It has taken up more time then I imagined. I haven’t been able to time manage all these things. I’ve realized after I posted my video about the AEP, adoption education program, that I mumbled about the weather more times then I would have liked. I rushed through the editing so I could make dinner.

I need to rethink about how I would like to manage my time. I did this for my writing last year and I was able to publish a book. A schedule is needed when you have so much on the go. I love writing. It is my main passion when it comes to life. I would love for it to be my full-time job so I can have flexible hours when Mark and I are placed with our child.

Above all…
Adoption has been weighing heavily on my mind.

Adoption has taken up most of my energy as I have been trying to contact social workers, educating myself about adoption, and talking to friends and family about the adoption. With my YouTube channel, Our Journey to Family, I have tried to answer as many questions about our process. There are weeks where we haven’t moved forward and I am online looking at profiles of the Children in Waiting. Every time I read those little profiles my heart hurts for them. I know we can’t adopt all of them…
With the vlog, I hope to educate people about adoption. If I could get one more family to think about adoption then I will be satisfied. It was an easy choice for us, but that’s not the case with everyone else.

Adoption can be scary. You don’t know the trauma that your child will come with. It’s a hard transition for the children that come into your home. For one, they were chosen to be part of a family. And on the other hand, they were given up/taken by their biological family. Mark and I both had blessed childhoods so it’s hard for us to truly relate what the child will be going through. We both know we have the patients and the support from our family to help our child however they need.

Vlogging about adoption has me facing my biggest fear. People hearing my voice. I am trying to get better with how I present myself on camera. There are moments though, where videos like yesterdays happen. Where I mumble about everything under the sun, and the sun. I should rename the video Rambles by Chianne due to me bouncing all over the place. But the vlog is a life vlog as well. The adoption in at the point of a standstill so there isn’t much to discuss.
I want to do a video covering the emotions that go with being able to see the children’s profiles (no pictures) and wondering about our lives together. It has given me much to think about. There are many more videos that I would like to do covering trauma, FASD, and what we learn through our AEP and home study.

Now it’s time to hit the time management board.
If there is anything that you would like to learn about adoption or have an adoption story please let me know in the comments below.

Thank you for reading,
C. B. Dixon

 

 

OurJourney toFamily

Click to see YouTube Channel

 

 

Our Journey to Family

Mark and I have had a lot on the go lately. We’ve moved across the water, ocean, from Vancouver Island to the mainland. I got a new job that made me switch from being a nanny back into daycare. And, now, our announcement! We’re adopting!

For anyone that has found my tiny channel on YouTube called Our Journey to Family, you have most likely seen the announcement video. If you haven’t and would like to see it, here it is: (click photo)

DSC09050

Click Photo!

 

I will be getting on the ball with the videos soon. I’ve been enjoying making them. I have a lot of great updates since we’ve moved. I hope you all enjoy.

Mark and I have chosen to adopt through the foster system here in BC, Canada. I expected it to be a long tiresome process, but that hasn’t been the case. We have had great success with the new setup they have for the application process. It’s all online, at first

It’s all online, at first it was strange, weird, and felt as if I was online shopping for a child…but when all the pieces fell into place so smoothly I withdrew that thought. It was straight to the point, fast, and user-friendly.

Our choice to adopt came from Marks idea that there are many children in the world that need a loving safe home. It took a while for me to sink into the idea. I had always pictured me having my own kids. Now, I look at that thought differently. Own kids, I always thought of that as giving birth to a child makes that child mine. After chewing on the idea for, well it as a year or more, I realised for a child to be mine doesn’t mean I have to give birth to the child. I have to love, care for, and guide the child through their life. To parent the child. Not like what I do at work, daycare, where I raise other people’s tiny humans. This child will call me mom. They will rely on me for more than guiding them by the hand day by day until their parent comes and takes them home…I will be that parent that picks them up.

Once I started thinking about adoption, I started thinking about kinds of adoption. There were more than I thought. Domestic; a birthmother chooses you. International; you chose a country other than the one you live in to adopt from. Or adoption from foster care; a child is removed from their biological family due to no fault of their own. I thought about domestic, a baby, I’d have a baby! And then…I’d think about all those children already in the system. Lot’s of people want a baby, I know I want a baby…but all those children that are waiting…they were a baby once.

After battling with myself I talked to Mark about adopting through the foster system. That’s already what he was planning on doing, but he knew I wanted a baby. International was already out of the question, for now. It was then that we started our application.

Now, here we go on Our Journey to Family.